Competition at last night’s Miss USA Pageant preliminaries was so intense that the 10 judges huddled for 10 extra minutes after the two-hour bikini and evening gown presentations before turning in their verdicts. Those are now locked away until the 15 semifinalist picks are announced on Sunday’s NBC telecast of the 60th anniversary pageant at Planet Hollywood.

The panel of fashion experts, casting executives and magazine editors also included veteran Las Vegas publicist Wayne Bernath, who represented master magician Lance Burton for many years. In addition to watching the parade of contestants, they interviewed every one of the 51 pageant princesses.

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Hilarious. Except it's not.

Geez, I feel so inadequately prepared for my daughter's future life as a woman starting at age 5.

Can't she just stay in bubble dresses and show off the rolls in her thighs forever. Wait, I guess I'm working toward covering things up. Crap, this is going to be rough.

Thanks for the laugh!

Reply

Shudder …. usually I'd just add to the snark, but this is a hot-button issue with me.

Kids in 2-piece swimsuits don't bother me too much, if it's something like a tankini or a sports-bra style top (i.e. lots of coverage, no padding, no 'cleavage' etc.) My kiddo is uber-skinny with a long torso, and most 1 piece suits don't fit her properly.

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